I think I’ve probably always had a slight hearing disability. When I had my first formal hearing test as a young professional, the plant nurse reported that I had some hearing loss in my left ear. At the time I put it down to ill-fitting headphones but she was probably right.
It was 34 years until my next hearing test, and sure enough the audiologist reported that I had a weak left ear, and my right ear was normal. By then I’d spent half a lifetime in and out of noisy plant environments. I got a hearing aid for my left ear only, and it made a fair difference in my aural acuity. I could hear birds again, and I knew where they were singing from. I also got to hear whining disk drives, refrigerator compressor noise and other cool stuff I hadn’t really missed up till then.
Well fast forward another dozen years, my wife’s complaining I don’t hear what she says anymore and I have trouble picking up all the grandkids’ talk. So it was back to the local hearing aid center today. This time I found out I have pretty good low frequency response (although the dam’ left ear is still worse) but rather profound decline in both ears as I go to higher frequencies. My verbal acuity can use a little help too.
Now two (count ’em) hearing devices are indicated. I have never liked the beans in your ears sensation I get from my 2004 era hearing aid so that prospect didn’t thrill me.
The Hearing Instrument Specialist looked at me as if I’d just stepped off the boat from nowhere. It seems that technology has advanced slightly in the past 12 years. Now they have a little unit that sits behind your ear, a small wire runs down to your ear canal and the receiver works off that. Completely open, no plugged ears. And man are those units awesome – they can be programmed to boost the missing frequencies, cut out background noise, and even help with tinnitus if you have it (I do.) I couldn’t believe the difference these little suckers made.
So now all I need is money. The costs are equivalent to a nice Caribbean cruise per ear. My provincial health plan helps out but only a little. I suppose it’ll be worth it if Maria doesn’t have to shout and repeat stuff three times though.
So this year I’ve already found out I might need cataract surgery in a year or so, and now YASTAH – Yet Another Sense Takes A Hike. Good thing I don’t taste for a living any more. That’ll probably be next. Getting old sure ain’t for sissies, as Bette Davis once remarked. And she had the eyes for it.
